en passant is an abomination. In this house we play pre-1561 chess.

Holy hell

shhh youre gonna wake up anarchychess

You know when you were a kid, playing tag, and someone would do a crazy contortion to get by you, and you just grazed the fabric of their shirt? And then you’re like, “I got you!” and they’re like, “Nuh-uh, I didn’t feel it!” and because you’re it, you have the final say. So you can either be like, “nah, you’re still in,” or, “fuck you, I tagged you,” and they have to go off and they start crying about how unfair it is for you to target them while you go easy on your friends, and everyone starts calling them crybaby.

En passant is almost nothing like that. Almost.