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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: August 11th, 2023

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  • Uni! We were just friends, though very good friends. But still firmly just friends, she was actually in a relationship for a good part of our friendship and I had zero interest in going beyond good friends with her in particular, and I especially knew better than fall for a person in a relationship - I’ve never seen one of these end well. I haven’t been interested in dating for most of my life. But I think that’s because my social life and self esteem has been seriously eeh in middle and high school, while I started really working on a social life in uni. Before jumping to dating I wanted to get a few basics down - a good friend group (ended up being several of them!), a real social life and some 1:1 close friends. Plus my own personal world of hobbies, ambitions and interests. You know - a good world to introduce a person to. At one point, I was feeling finally ready for a relationship and excited to try and accept this possible direction in life. I started acting as someone who’s interested in dating: worked on my appearance and self esteem, got more social and made it a point to socialize with everybody at events. That friend I mentioned earlier actually was on a small personal “Do not date” blacklist, because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship (read: be rejected and see the other person go cold on you until you lose them completely… I had already made that mistake) and she was the person with whom I naturally vibed the absolute best - it was effortless. Who wants to lose the effortoess friend who doesn’t drain their social battery at all?

    I guess it was so effortless that when it was supposed to happen it happened, things happened, our friendship was starting to develop in a “dangerous” direction (which was making me feel wary to be fair because I was definitely starting to catch feelings), then at one point she made a move and it felt like an impossible dream come true, like the best case scenario that was so good I was not even considering it as a valid option coming to life. Easily one of the happiest moments of my life. And the rest is history.



  • Interesting. I wonder if it can run on my Raspberry Pi 3b+, or if the single GB of RAM doesn’t cut it, it will be up in my list of things to do together with immich, grocy, paperless-ng and NextCloud when I manage to build my real homelab. I’ve read enough horror stories about smaller instances disappearing so this seems like a good way forward?

    Even then, I can’t say this is intuitive. I’m an advanced Linux user with sysadmin skills. I can pull this off in a few hours, but I doubt it’s the same for average Joe…


  • Fair point, but it seems absurd to me that a supposedly community-based instance gets harsher on privacy than a corporation that’s about to IPO. That seems off to me. Then again: lack of a big legal team. Understandable. Sad, inconvenient, but understandable. I’m not mad, I’m just sad. Mostly because this legal war on piracy is not only on piracy, but on software freedom (DRM, WEI, etc) and privacy (for a lot of media, there is no privacy-respecting way to legally acquire it)

    Another thing that seems off is that this announcement has been made on the Discord server. Now, I don’t want to come across as that guy. I admit I use Discord regularly, because that’s what my friends are on and all efforts to migrate them to something more privacy-respective have been futile, mostly due to the lack of fleshed-out and comparable alternatives for now. But… why should a Fediverse instance have an official server on Discord? I feel like it kinda goes against the whole philosophy of this entire thing. Then again I’m new, so I might be in the wrong here. But wouldn’t a Matrix server or something be a better fit for this sort of thing?


  • Sync. I come from Reddit and that’s what my favorite client defaults to. It’s not optimal, because of the reason you say. I am totally OK with new apps presenting users with an easy “one-click” choice of instance to make onboarding easy, but having one accepted default has this side effect. If I were to maintain a Lemmy app, I’d probably select the “default” instance for a new user by selecting one at random in an array of popular instances, and then offer the user to subscribe to the official community of my app (wherever instance it’s on) to keep up. Maybe I can hit up the dev with some feedback on this on the official community.

    And now, just like it ended up with Mastodon, I’ll have to maintain multiple accounts for Lemmy. Such a good user experience, it will totally catch on…

    Seriously. Accept this piece of criticism from someone new to the Fediverse. Being harsher on piracy than a fucking corporation and forcing users to migrate accounts left and right / have multiple accounts to be able to easily access content out of your Mastodon instance’s niche and having to get around your instance defederating and blocking content you wanted to see is just abysmal UX. Are we supposed to have our content scattered around how many accounts? And for those who don’t like mobile apps, at this point I can only use Sync (Lemmy) and Tusky (Mastodon) through my phone to browse the Fediverse for lack of a good option to maintain multiple accounts on desktop. Firefox containers are just overkill for this, but I welcome suggestions.

    End rant, and sorry if it’s a long-winded disorganized ramble. Is lemmy.ml good to get around this block?