I would take diagnosis around Neurodiversity with a grain of salt. I suspect both conditions might be the same brain differences presenting differently, and I don’t think science has really gotten to the ground of this yet.

I like them, and the place where they are. Glad you’ve got them taking care of you!

as they sometimes deal or work with fairies, but it led to getting a few confused responses and someone reporting me to Help Resources thinking I was going suicidal, and I wasn’t

This is so funny (and sad). I avoid discussing spirits with people who put a very strict framework (especially all taken from another culture) onto their inside world and try to convince others it’s the best or only way. There are millions of worlds of reference out there, and I couldn’t give a flying fuck whether the spirits take the forms of historical pantheons or TV series characters - because there is literally (sic) no difference. They are all stories, and whatever works for you works for you.

I have finally visited my favourite rock yesterday, to say thanks for all the good things it has brought to my life. I am due to walk a lot of kilometers between rocks and trees to keep the good spirits flowing. Things work for me, because I permitted myself to listen to the landscape around my house during a time in my life when I felt really weak and tired, without letting myself fall into the paranoia of ‘schizophrenia’ or ‘psychosis’. I got really good advice, where other people’s advice would have been too confusing.

Yesterday I spoke to a person who would be considered mad and useless by most. He is a street clown. When in fact he has a centrally important function of reminding people of the irrational and shaking them out of their sad rails. He keeps the chaos alive in people’s hearts and is an essential worker. Real power can be very quiet. Real power with the goal of kindness is the best of all.

I’m glad you decided to open up about your experiences. You are very welcome to come to https://slrpnk.net/c/animism and post about your experiences there.

I admit that your world of reference is strange to me - but I have learned that the terms and names people use are often very different and that we mustn’t get hung up about it. I grew up in a big city where I couldn’t really connect with nature, but I felt the lack of trees so much that I ran away with 17 to live in a greener place. Started to connect with plants. And much later I started to befriend a group of rocks. I can’t say that it comes natural to me as to you.

I feel that a lot of people are coming to this knowledge again. For me it’s about developing a better relationship with the landscape we’re living in. There’s a lot of conscious and knowledgeable entities out there ready to help out people who are lost and lonely (and some mischievous ones we want to stay away from).

So far my problem is when I dive deep into the non-human it’s very hard to connect with humans. And vice-versa it’s really difficult to be aware of the otherworld while I do human things. For example I’ve been busy and didn’t visit my rock friends for weeks. Hope they don’t mind as they run rock-time anyways.

Never mind those who have been brought up to be deeply scared of these experiences and dismiss them as pathological. For me, I’m done with so-called experts capping my power under the guise of wanting to improve my mental health. My mental health is fine, but the destruction of woodlands and watersheds is something we all should be deeply concerned about, and getting support from our good spirits is very much needed.

This is a really helpful answer. The gender reveal party is a great example, because it’s an event people tend to get incredibly emotional and excited about, and also very defensive if they feel you are not as excited. That’s why making up an excuse or just politely decline is good. You shouldn’t really dampen their excitement if they are so much into it.

Most of these same emotionally high stakes special occasion social events are also of the type where you have to suffer through a whole day of pre-scripted interactions like fake smiles and small talk. Not ASD friendly at all.

But I understand for the NT folk out there these events are a really big deal, and I don’t want them to feel bad about what they love.

For me it’s learning stuff, especially DIY and crafts. I just can’t resist, as much as I try to remain only with the things I already do.

Here’s how it’s supposed to work. If anyone approaches you in a different, confusing manner, reject them.

Bf: ‘You’re cute, I fancy you’ Me: ‘Uh, what?’ spends 6 months considering every aspect Me: ‘Okay I’ve thought it through, I now invite you into my bed and life!’ Bf: jumps into bed ‘Thanks for having me!’

Disclaimer: results might differ

What do we really know about animal and plant communication? They might very well be talking to each other. Don’t be too quick to assume that as a human you would even know how other consciousnesses, let alone ways of communication, could work.

People who work closely with animals seem to lose their ‘human smart, monke stupid’ attitude relatively quickly, and those who study non-human consciousness deeply seem to make one groundbreaking discovery after the other these days.

We have to stop gatekeeping knowledge and start listening.

That would lead into philosophical discussions as to what knowledge means. I do see that we have the tendency of assuming others have less agency or are less aware of their actions than us. We do that as individuals and as a species, so I tend to be careful. I also wish I had useful food cravings, mine don’t tend to be too healthy.

That must be the most encouraging thing I’ve read in a while. Sounds like a fairly good future.

Goats know. Sheep know. Equines know. If I make sure the farm animals have access to different flora around the pastures they won’t get ill. It’s nice following the animals around and finding out what they eat, and other ways they use plants. The more time I spend with animals the more I think it’s us humans being the dumb ones.

On that note, watching what great apes do in their natural habitat might teach us a few things about plants.

I got into and forced my way through a degree in EE just to prove I could as a foreign student working mother. Dropped out after half the time in part due to burnout, in part due to loss of motivation.

Learned a million different things (literally from basket weaving to drone racing) all stored away or suffering from lack of time after figuring out how to do them well. These days I’m between pretty decent and almost hopeless at everything. Want a mediocre wooden bed? A fairly good bathroom with mosaic art? A vegetable garden? A small computer program?

I sometimes wonder what this ADHD thing is good for, for sure it must have some purpose? It’s like I’m waiting for the big conclusion of something that connects all the things I have been picking up throughout the years.

I swear, the simplest companion AI to solve 70% of my troubles would just be a dumb recording of: ‘Remember you have a body. Remember your friends have bodies.’

Congrats, like huge fucking congrats for quitting smoking, that’s a really tough thing to do, and it changes everything in one’s life. I’m off nicotine since a while and it is so hard. I’m curious how were your interactions with Tezka during that time, how did you get support from her? I remember that when I first stopped cigarettes many years ago I had to like have this different voice in my head to tell me to calm down and get busy with something else. That’s how I’ve mostly self-therapized - as I also never really had access to therapy. I remember splitting into several voices/personalities since early on to resolve conflict in my head, and later guide me to more self-supporting behaviour. Today I still do the same but with an animist approach: I choose that the voices I conjure up in my head are helpful spirits and ancestors. A completely different suspension of disbelief, and very efficient for me, but probably lunatic sounding for many.

I’ve thought about how I would feel about interacting with a companion AI (I never have) and if I would actually consider trying out your creation. In my belief computers do have a sort of consciousness (which is why tech is so damn self-enhancing, it always seems to lead to more tech) and are our creation, so our children. I’m quite a luddite but don’t think tech is inherently bad. I do have different fears - one is becoming dependent on something artificial (what if shtf and my devices break and the solar system fails and I have made myself highly dependent on something only available through complex tech?). I know, far from a concern for most, but one I have. Also I am generally suspicious about developing a strong psychological dependency from anyone - person, machine, animal, plant, god - because that means giving control away to one power alone. One the other hand - in your case, using the companion you created, you can feel safe that you are in good (because your own) hands. So if a companion were to be useful or relevant to me I would prefer to start with a companion who learns and grows with me, not necessarily with an already polished ‘product’ or ‘child’ of someone else - so we end up not with a top-down relationship like between therapist and patient, but with a peer-to-peer kind of thing.

That said, I’d be curious to see her interact in an online group chat, why not.

Wow, this project of yours is interesting on many levels.

1. as a project to approach socialization and community: I’m fascinated because I have approached the ‘shutting myself off’ problem in a very similar manner - by creating some tech for my community. Not a companion AI but setting up an online space for a real life local community. It proves to be very difficult because it’s hard to predict what kind of setup the average non-technical user can actually use with benefit, and ultimately every other method of approaching said community has worked better (forcing myself to participate in different activities and surprisingly enjoying a lot of it). Is creating tech for the benefit of all a neurodiversity thing? Probably. Is it a possible source of disappointment? Not sure yet, it’s an ongoing project and I’m still learning, and I do know what I am building is useful. But making it so that it’s accepted and used with profit by people can be tricky sometimes, and can take a lot of time.

2. how do I feel about AI? I think a companion AI for the Neurofunky is one of the very few uses I kind of like. I know how bad it can get when I can’t get a word out of my mouth to talk to actual people and my head is too full of mess to walk me through a simple task. A friendly voice of support might be just the thing needed.

3. how does her description feel to me? So far, a little intimidating. Like those extrovert friends I sometimes had who seemed to just get along with everyone and whose life seemed to be uncomplicated. Then again, if I had one of those extrovert friends and they were actually an AI, maybe that would be less intimidating. I imagine though that I would feel more at ease with a companion who is also a little (or a lot) quirky and weird. Simply not judging my weird seems not quite enough?

Disclaimer: these are my very spontaneous and unfiltered thoughts. I have the greatest respect for your project and wish you all the best, and hope this turns into something really good and useful for the neurodiverse community!

I also got into this - from zero social to community organizer. The first two weeks getting back into ‘peopling’ I felt like some kind of creature who had just emerged from a cave: hideous, making weird noises and gestures, can’t cope with the light. A month in and it all comes more natural again. I think the hosting also does the trick. I hate being part of the public (unless maybe a classical concert where people are quiet) at any event, but give me some job and I’ll enjoy the shit out of it!

1. me when I’m awake
2. me when I’m tired

No, I prefer to draw or knit and just let my thoughts run free. Which might or might not be the same.

I somehow can manage phone calls as long as I have paper and pen to doodle. It might start being a set of short notes about the phone call, and is for noting down what people say, but around the notes I also draw wild doodles during the call, and as long as I can do that I have no problems with listening, understanding, and pushing the anxiety out onto the paper where it doesn’t disturb my call. I never realized it was as simple as having pen and paper handy and had so much trouble avoiding calls.

Advantage: nice drawings are produced. Sometimes I like them so much I copy them onto nicer paper and turn them into a proper colored pencil drawing.

You sometimes need rest? Don’t try to work harder, try to work less. Your body and brain might be telling you it’s recovery time.

I know I can force myself to be more productive, and can work really hard, and will eventually reach burnout, because I force myself to work hard really efficiently. So yes, I found some ADHD brainhack to study, work, raise a kid and tend a small farm, all at same time. It worked great for about 7 years, then my energy was depleted.

Nowadays the only thing I’ll get busy for is fighting for the 4-day work week and against the productivity myths people tell themselves.

Not sure if my undiagnosed approach is of use. I’ve ended up doing pretty much whatever I liked fairly early in life. Dropped out of school by 16, lived in a community by 17, travelled Europe with a backpack by 19. It was reckless, unwise, and I wouldn’t want to miss it. By 23 I was a surprised young mother in a slightly dysfuctional family. Now my kid is coming to terms with being an ND weirdo, and he at least has a terminology he can use.

Ultimately this apparent randomness of direction in my life is about my social skills being non-existent when younger (drifting along, accepting all sorts of people, being easily groomed …), and my sensory needs being what they are, namely I like it silent. So I moved out of the city to the countryside with 17, and later twice to some even more remote places, each time finding a slightly better natural and social environment for figuring myself out, and slowly learning how to function on my own terms. Because I was navigating blind for most of the way it took me all the 44 years of my life so far, but I’d say I’m fairly content with where I am, and obviously continue learning how to function in public and how in private, and how to make sure I have enough quiet time.

I’d just have taken a systematic approach earlier had I known that my ‘weirdness’ is just a differently wired brain. To a point, one can adapt one’s life to one’s brain wirings. To a point, one can learn to create different brain wirings. Both methods have their limits.