definitely not. i hope you can find something to help.

imagine you start to get your shit together, start some habits to get you on a better footing, and then there’s a week where you just can’t every month. and maybe there’s also a mid-month slump, because hormones suck.

i didn’t see a therapist until i had one weekend to run all the errands, see doctors and vets, clean the house up… there was just the one weekend where i was sure i’d have enough of an upswing.

-general anxiety and depression diagnosis, plus PMDD (pre-menstrual dysphoria disorder), the drugs are great and i’m better now

I’ve allowed my partner to refer to me as girlfriend to make discussion with others easier. I don’t love it, it doesn’t sound like a longterm adult relationship, but I recognize it’s easier to say “my wife and my girlfriend”.

and both of us go to family Christmas, though not everyone needs to know relationship status.

… you’re absolutely right about the scheduling thing though.

there’s a whole 2 of us! seriously though, if there’s pink it gives me a stomach ache. as I’ve gotten older I can just about tolerate a medium well, but I still prefer well done.

I prefer the seats facing each other, but only because sitting sideways to the direction of motion somehow makes me less car sick.

Definitely still headphones in, eyes down. Pretend I’m focused on my phone or knitting, even if all I can think about is nausea, because i definitely don’t want another awkward bus conversation. Make sure the knitting is contained on my lap and doesn’t spill into anyone else’s seat.

the busses were less crowded post covid here, and the solution seems to be fewer busses so it’s more “efficient”. which is awkward when using it to commute and my options go from “10 minutes early, on time, 10 minutes late” to “30 minutes early or 20 minutes late”.

my partner literally keeps track of my cycle better than I do, so he warns me it’s upcoming. he understands the complications that make birth control not an option, and provides condoms even though it’s difficult for him to find comfortable ones. he’s less troubled by the general mess of a period than I am.

even my brother, who has done his best to remain uneducated about such things, has a general understanding. he might not know exactly how birth control works, but he knows it doesn’t always work or has other effects. he knows we don’t have any control over a period, or pms, but that it shouldn’t make women crazy and incapable (PMDD sucks, but there’s medication so I can be a normal human instead of sobbing for a week).