While this all seems reasonable I would like to point out a couple things. First that ADHD is a real thing that people struggle with, and many are not diagnosed until after they finish school (or not at all in some cases). So yeah sometimes their are spurious diagnosis given by teachers (who aren’t even qualified to give a diagnosis btw), but on the whole it’s under diagnosed.

I also think it’s good to point out that in a good education system you should have things like ability sets and G&T programs. When I went to school they had sets in secondary education at least, but not in primary education for some reason. Little funding for G&T programs as well. This doesn’t make the greatest amount of sense, especially for people like you and your wife.