There are a lot of reasons, but I think this article does a good job of listing the main criticisms: https://www.themarysue.com/the-autism-speaks-controversy-explained/

But in a nutshell:

• They frame autism as a disease that needs curing
• None of their board members are autistic
• They spread fear and misinformation about autism
• As a charity, embarrassingly little of their money goes to actually doing anything for autistic people

I’d second this suggestion, I’ve used borg with rsync.net for the past 4 years and it’s been great.

I’m really sorry, I had colitis and it was awful. I really hope you find some relief from it.

I’m so sorry that happened to you. You didn’t deserve it: nobody does.

You’re doing your best.

This internet stranger is proud of you.

Gary Oldman is younger than Gary Numan.

Oh wow I never realised I was missing tornado facts from my life but I am genuinely loving learning about this.

I’ve had a lot of good experiences with ear plugs. I’ve used musician’s earplugs to help reduce noise without blocking it out entirely, and while I don’t have personal experience with Loop earplugs I’ve heard a lot of positive things about them.

Regarding seeming “rude” by wearing earplugs: I completely understand the concern here. All I can really offer is that you’re doing something to look after and care for yourself: if other people have a problem with it then its a “them” problem, not a “you” one. This is just a personal method I use to help me get over the worry: I think of myself as a child, and consider how validating it would feel to see an adult wearing hearing protection/whatever else to make them feel comfortable, and how it would help child-me feel more empowered about my own comfort and needs. So I do it for child-me, and if that also gives anyone else a boost or helps them not to feel so awkward then that’s just a win for everyone.

Well I don’t know if it helps, but the way I think of that is that if I didn’t stick to the times, I’d be letting me down.

Yeah, I understand that. I haven’t found an easy solution to that.

With hobbies, the thing I’ve found most useful is to set a structure of making that time for myself to do the thing I enjoy. Even if it’s just an hour or two, one evening a week. That way I’ve mentally created the space where I can say “that time is for me, to do my hobby”. Sticking with it, even if I think “I’d rather be with my favourite person at this time” helps add some balance (plus it’s a defence against that feeling of neglecting myself when I’m hyperfocused on someone else).

I do this, and can relate with how nerve-wracking it is. I’m afraid I haven’t hit on any techniques to stop it entirely, but for me I found things like mindfulness practices help with some of the runaway or obssessive thinking. Also, finding hobbies or activities I can do by myself has helped me feel less like I’m only happy when I’m with/talking to my “favourite person”.

It sounds like you’re getting a specific kind of headache, perhaps a migraine or a cluster headache, that can be debilitatingly painful. The fact that you throw up sounds a lot like it’s a migraine.

I can’t function with a migraine. I have to take pain medication, lie down in a dark room and hope I can sleep it off.

I find box breathing quite helpful: breathe in for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, breathe out for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, and then keep repeating this. I find the counting soothing, and eventually my mind slows down and I can start noticing the things around me.

Terry Pratchett. I’m grateful for the books he wrote and the impact he had on my life, but I feel we lost a champion for wit and empathy when he died.

👏