I think that’s a fair point.

A lot of my favorite games are indie titles or from small dev teams.

You didn’t have to deal with random re-balancing changing your gameplay, spying and tracking embedded in everything, hackers ruining the game or targeting you, invasive DRM (consoles), being forced to update your system for an hour before you can play, being forced to sign up for bullshit accounts in order to play the game you just bought, games that have required updates the day they come out, your games disappearing forever because the publisher changed their mind and removed it from the store, game content being removed to sell as DLC instead, being pressured to link social media accounts, bigger companies buying the game and forcing you to use their services to play it, companies monitoring and recording player interactions, companies going under making it impossible to play the game you already bought…

Holy shit. I never realized how bad modern gaming has gotten.

Exactly! It’s nice to have my subconscious be so helpful, but trying to think through something without putting it in front of me in some way is damn near impossible. And if someone interrupts me while I’m trying to think, then POOF! It’s all gone.

I feel like an idiot, but other people assume I must be smart because I’m decent with problem solving. I’m really not smart. I’m probably just average, but slightly more self aware of how my own mind works.

It’s such a weird position to be in, right?

I forget if I put this in the original post, and I’m too lazy to check. But do you have trouble with your memory too? Like, I’m okay with recent bullet-point facts about an event, but couldn’t describe what I did yesterday in any real detail.

I can tell you that I ate food in the kitchen and enjoyed it, but I can’t describe the experience of it very well, if at all. In a few days, I may even forget what the food I ate was. It’s already slipping. I know facts like it was hot and had cheese, I stood over the counter and had Dr. Pepper, but I couldn’t paint a picture for you. I couldn’t describe the experience of it very well, because I’d have to make assumptions and try to recreate what it must have been like.

It sucks because that means I’m always recreating the event in mind head in order to try and remember it better, but without the aid of visualization. And apparently that seems a lot like I’m making things up and lying all the time. It sucks so much. And if I tell someone I don’t remember something well enough to talk about it, they also assuming I’m lying. “It was just last week, how do you not remember?”

The more stressed I am, the worse my memory for that time is. And no matter what I do, I’m always the weird suspicious person.

It’s exhausting.

ASD with contamination OCD here. I hate mushrooms, but strangely enough, love tempah. That’s basically soy curds glued together with edible mold.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Brains are weird.

… this just reignited my desire for a boyfriend, but like, one that’s also autistic, so he fucking gets me. We’ll have lunch in perfectly comfortable silence at a busy diner and judge people that talk too loud in public. It’ll be great!

Or in my case, my parents getting angry AT ME for “acting weird” when a well-meaning teacher at school thought I was on drugs and had them call my mom to pick me up for a drug test in the middle of class.

I was just anxious because they had a surprise visitor coming in to judge our work before college application season started. to this day, I still don’t know what I did or said that caused that reaction.

…What

I’ve always done this. This is a thing?

Huh. I hadn’t thought about that. That’s not a bad point either.

Why would Reddit ban it? It’s an easy way for them to collect users’ IP addresses for their corporate overlords.

Not disagreeing, but I think the point is that no single person or company should be in a position of that much power. All it takes is for one thing to go wrong, one law to change, or one financial scare to happen, and BOOM. Suddenly this great monopoly is doing things people hate and there’s no alternative.

To be fair, a lot of monopolies are great in the beginning. It’s the inevitable power-tripping downslide that sucks.

I still love Steam and Valve though.

I laughed out loud. Saving that pic.

But yeah, I didn’t realize for the longest time that most people can see things in their minds at will. I never got an official diagnosis, but I tick damn near every box, and literally every person I’ve mentioned probably being autistic to has said something like “Oh, that makes sense!” I’m actually talking to a professional this weekend to see what she thinks.

No books though, sorry.

Sad to see this fork of SC Controller is now archived. It provides an Appimage version, and also worked with my PS4 controller. Credit to Kozec, the original creator.

https://www.patreon.com/kozec

https://github.com/Ryochan7/sc-controller

There was also Qjoypad, but I haven’t used it in a while.

Basically, the game is reading the raw controller input as well as the translated virtual controller input. I’ve run into that a lot before on other games. The fix I found is usually to try another mapper, or to disable the controller in the game and map the controller to keyboard and mouse. It’s annoying.

With luck, you -might- have luck with closing the game and setting up the controller mapper, then start the game. If the mapping program provides an Xinput option, try toggling that and see if it helps.

Good luck.

EDIT: Did Kozec stop developing the app? I used to support them on Patreon before I lost my job. There haven’t been any official updates in a while. Sad day. :(

¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

I haven’t used “lol” in a long time, but started to do this earlier today and had to stop myself.

I feel seen.

EDIT: Eh, removed my bad half-joke.

You say it’s not much compared to others, but I think you should be proud. That sounds like a cool job!

I am into Linux and general tech stuff. I was an IT operations generalist, a jack of all trades. I did everything from hardware repair, Windows installation, investigation and quarantine for ISOC, license key management for my area, remote assistance, doing on-site or remote system administration and troubleshooting, etc… I learned a little bit of everything, but wasn’t an expert in any one topic. I’m unemployed right now though. Trying to find another job.

But I think your career so far sounds impressive. Don’t let your negative side tell you that you don’t belong. Sounds like you’re doing just fine. :)

UPDATE: I forgot to answer your questions about jobs. I don’t know how hard programming jobs are to find, sorry. Tech jobs in general are difficult to get the past year or two.

Wow, having a constant voice complaining in your head sounds exhausting. I’d end up treating my subconsious like a whiny kid and telling it to shut up all the time if I had that.

What kind of work do you do? It sounds amazing, to be honest.

Any tips for a slightly younger generation struggling with some of the same things?

When I was younger, I’d occasionally have hyper detailed dreams. Even though I think seeing the future is most likely BS, those dreams usually ended up being something that gave me massive deja vu months or years after I had them. Or rather, something would happen and I’d remember the dream, like the dream predicted the event. Wasn’t even anything interesting. One was literally just standing in line for lunch, seeing the seasonal decoration that got put up, and thinking that a poster was a different color than it had been in my dream. Can’t explain it, and it’s probably just my bad memory mixing things up.

The reason I mention it is because I almost never dream. And even when I do, it feels shallow and empty. Like you said, poor senses and low resolution.

But that made the rare and unexpectedly rich movie-like dreams all the more striking when I woke up. Most of the time, I simply go to sleep, then wake up as if no time has passed. Kind of makes me hate sleeping, because I feel like I’m just wasting time.

That said, my sleep schedule is all screwed up to. Always has been. My body never wants to stay awake or stay asleep for the same amount of time. One day, I’ll be wired for 20 hours and crash. Other days, I’ll sleep for 12 hours, wake up for 8, then need to sleep again.

Sorry if that’s a bit unrelated. Your sleep comment just made me think of it.