Some want attention - they want your reaction, often your overreaction so they can make themselves look like a victim. In these cases, ignoring them for a while will probably make them move on to the next target.
Some want power - they want you to look weak so they can look strong. They like the feeling that you can’t do anything to them. Ignoring these will make them continue. Here you have to fight back.
And yes, usually you don’t know what your bully wants.
Which, sadly, these days is a one-way ticket to you being in the alternative school. With your bully. If the bully, who is probably a football or basketball player, even makes it to the principal’s office instead of being given the royal treatment for having a student oh so randomly attack him!
Yeah, we used to fight all the time as kids, like really kick each other’s asses, bruses, blood. No one ever called anyone, the teachers just started dragging us by the ears to the bathroom to clean us up, that was it. Mom or dad asks what happened, I got into a fight, that was it.
Maybe things weren’t taken as seriously cuz I don’t live in the US. Things were a lot different back then. Now, they’re more or less like in the US, everyone just wants to take legal action… which IMO just adds further trauma to the situation. It doesn’t actually solve anything. They’re kids, they fight, they make up, that’s the cycle.
Maybe it’s also because we never had guns in schools. Even now, there hasn’t been a single incident regarding fire arms in schools.
Still, he won’t fuck with you any more. Hurt him and he’ll leave you alone. That’s s basic principle with all animals in nature. If you put up a fight, you’re left alone.
This worked for me in high school. I guess I wasn’t fun to torment, because I didn’t react at all. Someone would come up with nickname and try to make fun of me with it, and I just answered as if it was my name. They’d lose interest after a week or so. If thrown into the lockers, I’d just roll out of it and keep walking as if nothing happened, and it wouldn’t happen again.
The person who bullied me the most in grade school I actually found out was just really bad at trying to make friends. One thing I still remember was him pulling my chair out from under me so my spine grinded against the chair and I landed on my tailbone. It hurt like a mother fucker. But we ended up going on a field trip and somehow I ended up in the car with him and his mom, just the 3 of us. He asked if I wanted to play legos and told me I was was his best friend. It was surreal. I realized he didn’t know how to be a normal sociable kid and his bullying was just a shitty attempt to engage with someone he thought was his friend, or who he wanted to be his friend. Of course that didn’t make my back and ass hurt any less.
“Ignore the bullies and they’ll leave you alone.”
This really depends on the bully.
Some want attention - they want your reaction, often your overreaction so they can make themselves look like a victim. In these cases, ignoring them for a while will probably make them move on to the next target.
Some want power - they want you to look weak so they can look strong. They like the feeling that you can’t do anything to them. Ignoring these will make them continue. Here you have to fight back.
And yes, usually you don’t know what your bully wants.
I find that the ones that want attention don’t particularly enjoy being punched in the face either.
Yea, it’s really a 50/50
Came here to say this.
Throwing a punch worked way way better.
My punches weren’t great, so I started throwing chairs.
Yep, bad advice. Kick them in the nuts, break their nose and yeah, they’ll leave you alone.
Which, sadly, these days is a one-way ticket to you being in the alternative school. With your bully. If the bully, who is probably a football or basketball player, even makes it to the principal’s office instead of being given the royal treatment for having a student oh so randomly attack him!
The zero tolerance rules some schools have is absolutely terrible.
Yeah, we used to fight all the time as kids, like really kick each other’s asses, bruses, blood. No one ever called anyone, the teachers just started dragging us by the ears to the bathroom to clean us up, that was it. Mom or dad asks what happened, I got into a fight, that was it.
Maybe things weren’t taken as seriously cuz I don’t live in the US. Things were a lot different back then. Now, they’re more or less like in the US, everyone just wants to take legal action… which IMO just adds further trauma to the situation. It doesn’t actually solve anything. They’re kids, they fight, they make up, that’s the cycle.
Maybe it’s also because we never had guns in schools. Even now, there hasn’t been a single incident regarding fire arms in schools.
Still, he won’t fuck with you any more. Hurt him and he’ll leave you alone. That’s s basic principle with all animals in nature. If you put up a fight, you’re left alone.
This worked for me in high school. I guess I wasn’t fun to torment, because I didn’t react at all. Someone would come up with nickname and try to make fun of me with it, and I just answered as if it was my name. They’d lose interest after a week or so. If thrown into the lockers, I’d just roll out of it and keep walking as if nothing happened, and it wouldn’t happen again.
The person who bullied me the most in grade school I actually found out was just really bad at trying to make friends. One thing I still remember was him pulling my chair out from under me so my spine grinded against the chair and I landed on my tailbone. It hurt like a mother fucker. But we ended up going on a field trip and somehow I ended up in the car with him and his mom, just the 3 of us. He asked if I wanted to play legos and told me I was was his best friend. It was surreal. I realized he didn’t know how to be a normal sociable kid and his bullying was just a shitty attempt to engage with someone he thought was his friend, or who he wanted to be his friend. Of course that didn’t make my back and ass hurt any less.
My experience was, stuff the bully in his locker and he’ll never bother you or your friends again.
To be fair, he was starting football linesman and, uh, was trying to stuff a friend in his locker… with his coach’s apparent permission…
This advice actually worked for me though